Wednesday, January 31, 2007

If I were a hockey player (which I technically am)

Well I guess I was tagged by HG, (or was it MG?), but the point is that I was tagged at some point, so, if I were a hockey player...

Team: I know readers are asking...Flames, or Oilers? The answer? Team Canada!
Uniform Number: 2, in honour of Al MacInnis, probably the Flames all time best player.
Position: I have no scoring talent, so obviously defence. Plus, what forward wears #2?
Nickname: My current hockey nickname is Viper, but all-time is Lupes. Don't ask.
Dream Linemates: Well, Al MacInnis as my D partner, Gretz, Fleury and Messier up front. Broduer or Roy in net.



Rounding out the Powerplay: Are you kidding me? That line would be on a constant PP, except for they would have to make up for me. So it would be more like we would always be down 4 men to 5. Hmm...
Job: Let everyone else do their thing.
Signature move: Chirping the crap out of the other team once a victory was assured. I'm a bad winner sometimes.
Strengths: My Lanny McDonald moustache and dashing good looks.
Weaknesses: My failing knees. I'm just like #4 Bobby Orr!


Injury problem: Everything - my knees are messed, my shoulder is currently messed, and most of the time I have some foot problem related to the fit of my skates.
Equipment: Vapor XXX skates, old worn out gloves, and the piece de resistance...red pants!
Nemesis: Dominik Hasek - He got us in '98 and he's still going! He's like 80 years old for God's sake!
Scandal involvement: I won't go into it, but suffice it to say it's worse than Kristian Huselius but better than Sean Avery. Interpret that however you want.
Who I'd face in the Stanley Cup final: Well technically it would be the World Cup (Canada Cup), Olympics or World Championship finals, and we'd face the Czech Republic. Those guys are really good.
What I would do with the Stanley Cup after our victory: In the spirit of the Oiler's glory years, I'd get ripped and lose it.
Would the Media love me or hate me: The media would love me. I talk as much as Conroy and I think like Andrew Ference.

I'll tag Finny, Scarlett, the Guys at Oil Pressure. Don't ANY of you dissapoint me, I have a memory like an Elephant!

Oh, and upon request, Steal Thunder over at Completely Hammered!

22 comments:

hockeygirl said...

I know readers are asking...Flames, or Oilers? The answer? Team Canada!

You sneaky, sneaky...

Kyle said...

Cleverer than your average bear!

MetroGnome said...

Wow. Fleury made both of our lines. At least he has something left to cling to...

Kyle said...

Man, Theo was my hero. He's still one of the most impressive hockey players I've ever watched.

MetroGnome said...

Man, Theo was my hero. He's still one of the most impressive hockey players I've ever watched.
Me too. It's too bad he's such a scrub in real life though.

PB said...

Team Canada! Nice touch.

:-)

Kyle said...

Me too. It's too bad he's such a scrub in real life though.
I'm willing to give him a lot of lee-way. Have you ever read 'Fury'? Man, Theo's life was screwed up...not to mention Graham James was his coach...

Kyle said...

Team Canada! Nice touch.

:-)


Thanks man! Canada is in my blood.

Steal Thunder said...

I have a copy of 'Fury' as well. My parents gave it to me for Christmas when it first came out. He was my favourite player in the post cup years, and still remains one of my favourite Flames of all time. Whenever I get tagged (hint, hint), he would be my linemate for sure. Although it would be an interesting line, as we play a fairly similar style (and I'm only 5'8")...

when my twin brother lived in Edinburgh he saw him play a couple of times, which made me jealous to no end...

Apparently in one game the big enforcer guy (6'5", 235) challenged him to a fight at the beginning of the game and got his ass handed to him. Later in the game he tried to redeem himself by taking on Fleury again (after Theoren already had 2 goals and an assist in the game), and Theo beat the crap out of him a second time...

He may have his problems, but he was never afraid of anyone...

And I still think that Calgary would have been a much better fit for him in his last NHL years than Chicago was...

Scarlett said...

Nice choice in Team Canada.

Kyle said...

I'm actually a little obsessed with team Canada. I've got 6 team Canada jerseys
1. Team Canada '74 (WHL vs. USSR)
2. Team Canada 76-91 (Gretzky 99 stitching)
3. Team Canada 1996 World Cup (no name, always considered Mess or Theo)
4. Team Canada 2002 Alternate Black (MacInnis #2)
5. Team Canada 2004/1920 Winnepeg Falcons (CANADA, #94 stitching)
6. Team Canada 2006 (thinking about getting Downey on the back)

To contrast I only have 4 Flames jerseys and two Oilers jerseys, so I'm really not BSing when I say thats my team.

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